Just in case you still read this

ill try and keep u updated...right now im having a weak moment..im having a hard time holding the tears back..and tonight they are fighting hard to come out...i know soon i wont be able to keep them in...i guess this is a good thing tho..i needed this time to realize what i lost..the only thing i can think about now is are u ok and have u found someone to treat u better than i did....its funny cause today i realized that i not only lost you..i lost my bestfriend...i did some stupid shit today(i got caught cheating on my trigonometry test) and the only thing i could think about was running back to my room and telling you what happened and how i just wanted to give up on life..but then i remembered i dont have that option anymore...*sigh*..yea so its hard..and i know its hard for you too..but u deserve better anyways...until next time bae